Literal Barrage

My browsers on each and every machine I have access to have been collecting open tabs like some hideously geeky HTTP-fueled version of Garbage Pail Kids/M.U.S.C.L.E. figurines/Pogs/[insert some other non-Pokemon hackneyed pop cultural reference here] and so, in order to unburden myself fully, I offer the following compendium of links. Consider it some sort [...]

I had a bit of an odd experience this morning.
I pulled into an Exxon station in Philly to tide me over until I could get to cheaper gas in Jersey and got out to fill my tank. After swiping my credit card, the machine prompted me to choose between "credit" and "debit". I [...]

My household's run-ins with termites have been well-documented here. I say this because, like Punxsutawney Phil and the Easter Bunny, they're back for their yearly emergence. Except this time, the exterminators are coming over immediately, as, and I am not making this up, we were unable to see a large portion of our [...]

Sweet merciful crap. The Heavens done opened up and poured down all day and, by the looks of it, we're in for a lot more. Our back porch is flooded and I don't even want to know what my basement looks like at this point.
Just think if it'd been 12° cooler - oh, [...]

Dear Google Search Results Quality Control Team,
What you do in the privacy of the Google offices is your own business, but please refrain from giving us in Joe Sixpack Flyover Country a view into those shady goings-on:

Seriously.
Signed,
Doug Stewart,
Concerned Internet Citizen
P.S.: As of this writing, that search phrase does indeed return the phrase in question.

When in doubt, plumb the YouTube well - that's what I always say.
First up is a video eminently worth watching, "Ryan vs. Dorkman 2", the story of two geeks with light sabers and serious vengeance complexes:

Next up, a Snickers commercial that has absolutely nothing to do with Snickers. Cool concept, though:

…You go to use the restroom, only to find that you were so tired and out of it when dressing yourself that you managed to put your underwear on inside-out and backwards.
I mean, hypothetically, of course. Not that I would do such a…
Oh dear.