Literal Barrage

My heart was in my throat as I sat in a rather uncomfortable chair, ears straining for the slightest sound. The woman swept the probe back and forth, seeking some sonic purchase. Will shifted uncomfortably, but silently in my lap, his tolerance for "grown-up" pursuits exhausted. The seconds stretched into what seemed [...]

My household's run-ins with termites have been well-documented here. I say this because, like Punxsutawney Phil and the Easter Bunny, they're back for their yearly emergence. Except this time, the exterminators are coming over immediately, as, and I am not making this up, we were unable to see a large portion of our [...]

It's been a rough few Nor'easter-fueled days at the ol' Stewart homestead, I tell you whut.
Sometime Sunday evening, the water rose high enough in our basement to snuff the pilot light on our hot water heater. The water only receded enough to attempt a re-light last night, a re-light which ultimately failed as the [...]

A few items of note, brought about by an Easter weekend spent with The Fam:
I believe that there is a Federally-mandated scent that all church restrooms' hand soaps must contain. It appears to be unique to church bathrooms, as I have yet to smell an analog in any other public dispenser.
Handel apparently wrote "Messiah"'s [...]

Growing up as the son of a Presbyterian minister had its more interesting moments, I can assure you, but one thing that much of my upbringing lacked was an experience in racially diverse congregations. Presbyterians, not known to be a terribly diverse lot, tend to put the "W" in WASP, in my experience (and [...]

I do apologize for the horrendous paraphrasing of John 15:13 in the title, but I do believe it's fairly apt.
Here's the skinny:
Part the First: William is absolutely terrified of vacuum cleaners in any incarnation - he despises our Dyson and can't stand the Dust Buster and always has issues with my parents' model. Whenever [...]