Subtitle: Why I haven’t posted much until now (as interpreted through a commonly recognized/often imitated/well-nigh cliched television commercial concept).
Owning a tape library that breaks down and eats a tape: $0.
Spending all day with a service technician verifying that, yes, it’s really stuck in there good: $0.
Fixing the tape drive through careful subliminal manipulation of said technician as the solution becomes obvious to you long before he: priceless
Some things, money can’t buy. For everything else, there’s service contracts.