Dear Kellogg’s Management,
As tempting as it may be, I would ask that you actively reconsider any pending hiring decisions for the position of “taste consultant” or “flavor engineer” involving one Sean Gleeson, as the damage to your corporate image could well be irreparable.
As evidence for my request, I offer his recent articles Rejected Pop-Tart flavors and More rejected Pop-Tart flavors. While your vast and varied Pop-Tart product line already features such flavors as “French Toast” and “Frosted Cookies & Creme”, I doubt the American public is ready for Mr. Gleeson’s suggestions, such as “Candy-Apple Guacamole”, “Shamrock Cinna-Tuna Crunch”, “Pizza-Berry Mint” and “Popcorn n’ Lox”.
Signed,
A Concerned Citizen
Attention, Kellogg’s: Do NOT Hire Sean Gleeson
Nice goin’, Doug. They were all set to test-market “Butterscotch Cheeseburger Parfait” until they read your blog.
It hurts just to read those flavors, Sean. *grin*
I’m just providing a public service here!
Now if you’ll excuse me, I just threw up in my mouth a little at the thought of the “Salty Saudi Banana” Pop-tart.