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Top Ten Rejected New Jersey Slogans

In local news, New Jersey “Don’t Call Me Acting” Governor Dick Codey revealed NJ’s new state slogan yesterday: “New Jersey: Come See For Yourself”. However, there was little discussion of the entries that weren’t selected. We here at Literal Barrage have managed to obtain a list of the top ten rejected slogans, which are as follows:

  1. New Jersey: Come Smell For Yourself.
  2. New Jersey: No, Seriously, What’s That Smell?
  3. New Jersey: Come For The Corruption, Stay For The Soul-Wrenchingly High Property Taxes.
  4. New Jersey: Stop Making Mafia Jokes Or We’ll Break Your Face.
  5. New Jersey: More Like “New Jersey Giants”, Right?
  6. New Jersey: We’re Right Between New York And Philly, So That Means, Like, Twice The Requisite Amount Of UPN And WB Affiliates.
  7. New Jersey: Getting The Government We Richly Deserve Every Four Years.
  8. New Jersey: Better Bring Change, Because There’s A Charge To Leave This Place.
  9. New Jersey: Stop Making Developer Jokes Or We’ll Eminent Domain Your House And Then Break Your Face.
  10. New Jersey: The “Garden” State – Yeah, Right.

8 responses to “Top Ten Rejected New Jersey Slogans”

  1. A R Baboon Avatar

    You forgot my favorate, which mind you existed long before the slogan contest:
    New Jersey, come for free, pay to get out.
    Also, I think that someone living more or less in Philly (well in terms of taxes anyway) should not be talking about smells. Philly has a permanent traveling funk cloud.

  2. A R Baboon Avatar

    Also:
    New Jersey, land so filled it no longer sinks into the swamp
    New Jersey, come see the faux Garden State
    New Jersey, strip mall of America
    New Jersey, paving away the future

  3. Doug Avatar

    There’s definitely a smell associated with a certain stretch of I-95 near Center City. Regular Philly commuters will know what I’m talking about.
    However, having driven through Elizabeth, NJ, I must say that the Stench of 95 pales in comparison.

  4. Dog & Pony Show Avatar
    Dog & Pony Show

    Hey, get it straight! It’s Secaucus, not Elizabeth!
    The great smell of Secaucus. It comes in a bottle…

  5. Doug Avatar

    I think that if we’re going to start listing the many different scents of NJ and their places of origin, we’re in for a very long comment thread indeed…

  6. Doug Avatar

    Which is not to say that PA is exempt from its own share of foibles worthy of their own mocking slogans. 30-year-old coal fires, for instance.
    It’s just that Jersey is such an easy target. In fact, I’ve thought of another rejected slogan:
    “New Jersey: You Can’t Spell ‘Superfund’ Without ‘Super’ And ‘Fun’.”

  7. Owen Avatar

    Darn that number 8!!
    It should be prefixed with, “You will get lost here on your way home from Philly.”

  8. AndyOne Avatar
    AndyOne

    My favorites:
    New Jersey: What do you mean towns aren’t supposed to blend like that?
    New Jersey – where else can you cross an entire state without seeing a cow?
    And of course, my favorite: New Jersey – Defender of the Jug Handle, Keeper of the Traffic Circle.