Stuff I Learned On The Internet[s], Recent History Edition

People approach me and say “Doug, we haven’t seen you post recently. What have you been learning on the Internet these last two weeks that you haven’t been posting?”^*
I learned that Matt Mullenweg started WordPress partially of a desire to help out his church.
I learned that one does not mess with Finns named Simo Häyhä, particularly if one is Russian.
I learned that Guy Ritchie is making a “Michael Bay version” of “Sherlock Holmes” (“I command ‘Sherlock Holmes’ to be awesome“):

I learned that Ted Vigilante is the single best superior court judge name ever and that he will likely have to be played by Chuck Norris, should a made-for-TV movie ever be produced based solely upon his name.
I learned that Sen. Jim “R0xx0r Your S0xx0rs” DeMint is not afraid to drop the XML Bomb on his crotchety Senate colleagues. (I also learned he desperately needs a new headshot that doesn’t make him look like a goober.)

I learned that Photoshop + New York City street corners + lots of spare time = awesome photo compositions (can you spot the themes?):

I learned that Will Ferrell can still be funny, in certain contexts:

I re-learned that there are few situations in which Hugh Laurie and Stephen Fry aren’t funny.
I learned that the government makes/has made a whole bunch of truly creepy “informational” comic books over the years.
I learned that the Kingston Trio is still alive and singing:

I learned that VCR tape covers didn’t die, they just hold hard drives now.
I learned that ShamWow(™exclamationpointoptional) also makes a great auto-tuned jam:

I learned that there’s an ongoing compendium of comic book-related urban legends. Also: Venom was supposed to be a woman.
^*Okay, no one actually asked me that, but they very well could have.