Football Folderol

Tony Romo
First off, the bad:

2007 Week 2 Fantasy Football Results

League: Fulford’s Heroes
Deep Fried Turkey defeats Hiphopopotamuses, 114.30 to 106.40.
*sigh* Jemaine’s luck runs out in the second week. I forgot to start Randy Moss who would have netted me another 15 points and secured a win. Them’s the breaks, I guess.
Next, the good:
Rhymenocerouses defeat Shake & Bake, 116.90 to 93.06.
Bret, on the other hand, did remember to start Moss and was rewarded with a win for his vigilance.
Last, the funny:
Eagles Fans Give McNabb Three-Week Deadline To Win Super BowlOnion Sports Network.

PHILADELPHIA—Frustrated with the Eagles’ last-second 16-13 loss to the Green Bay Packers last Sunday, and with quarterback Donovan McNabb’s failure to single-handedly score three touchdowns, prevent two of his teammates from muffing punts, or block any of Green Bay’s field goals, thousands of Philadelphia fans demanded that McNabb win an NFL championship for Philadelphia sometime within the next three weeks.

Heh. It would be far funnier if it weren’t true.

Fantasy Football Results, Week 1

I haven’t had much time to post today (I’m working on a bit of something secret with a few other WordPress hackers), but I thought I’d take time to let y’all know how our Conchords did this past weekend.
League: Fulford’s Heroes
Hiphopopotamuses defeat HOUSE HUNTER, 155.65 to 92.70
Rhymenocerouses defeated The Steel Hurtin, 89.53 to 76.35
An excellent start to a season, let’s hope the streak continues…
Applause for Bret and Jemaine has been moved to after the break because, well, it was just so distracting.
Continue reading “Fantasy Football Results, Week 1”

Flights Of Fantasy

I’ve just arrived back home from my second (and final) fantasy football draft for this season and, well, I’m not so sure how I’m going to do this year.
While I was able to ride on the back of Ladainian all last season (until he failed to show up the first week of the playoffs, consigning me and the mighty Barrage to the dustbin of history), I’m going to have to make it with two fair-to-middlin backs in each of the leagues this year. I drew the 4th pick in the first league and the 6th in the second. I came out in the drafts as follows (both drafts are listed in the order of my picks):

  1. Larry Johnson RB
  2. Willis McGahee RB
  3. Terrell Owens WR
  4. Marc Bulger QB
  5. Randy Moss WR
  6. Adrian Peterson RB
  7. Hines Ward WR
  8. Kellen Winslow TE
  9. Tony Romo QB
  10. San Diego DEF
  11. Nate Kaeding K
  12. Greg Jennings WR
  13. Kevin Jones RB
  14. Troy Williamson WR
  15. LenDale White RB


  1. Frank Gore RB
  2. Willis McGahee RB
  3. Philip Rivers QB
  4. Marques Colston WR
  5. Randy Moss WR
  6. LenDale White RB
  7. Jason Witten TE
  8. DeAngelo Williams RB
  9. Denver DEF
  10. Stephen Gostkowski K
  11. Terry Glenn WR
  12. Vincent Jackson WR
  13. Greg Jennings WR
  14. Alex Smith QB

As you can probably see, I ended up with a bit stronger team in the first draft. While both leagues are being run on Yahoo!, the drafts themselves could not have been more different. The first was held as an “off-line” draft, but we projected my laptop up onto a screen and filled in the draft results as we went along via the Comissioner view. No formal time was kept for picks and thus the draft lagged on for nearly 3.5 hours.
The second draft was held as an online draft, although 6 of the 10 teams were actually present in the same room. Picks were limited to 1.5 minutes each by the Y! system, meaning that the draft practically flew by.
So, we’ll see sometime later this year whether Bret or Jemaine is the better manager. My money’s on Jemaine..

Ever Have One Of Those “Neo/’Whoa!'” Moments?

James HuangLike, say, for instance, you’re watching Wednesday night’s Lost and you casually note that the ringleader of the gang of Phuket thugs that beat the crap out of Jack just happens to be played by none other than James Huang who was a class ahead of you in school and was your football, wrestling and lacrosse team captain as well as your consistent sparring partner throughout your later wrestling career? No? Just me?
Weird. Still, at least he hasn’t forgotten his roots, as… oh, wait, West Windsor-Plainsboro “South” (Pfeh!) doesn’t even appear in his IMDb bio. Oh well.

Fantasy Football Results, Week 13

Da foosball!
Soldiers of Fortune (192.25) defeated The Barrage (153)
Well, that’s it, folks. The Barrage went down in a blaze of glory. I’m a little gratified that all the other division winners lost as well. I think it was just a bit of a freak week; in fact, there was only one higher-ranked seed that won this week. Every game was an upset.
I’ll be supporting my fellow division-mates throughout the rest of the playoffs, so we’ll see how that goes. Here’s to hoping next year’s season goes better.

Fantasy Football Results, Week 12

My prescription: pain!
Bumskis (163.75 pts) defeated The Barrage (151.75 pts)
The Barrage (151.75 pts) defeated CTRL-ALT-DELETE (135.25 pts)

As I predicted, I did indeed have trouble with the bumskis, primarily because of the loss of Donovan McNabb. Had I had a quarterback to equal t.b.’s Drew Brees, I belive I would have had a shot at beating him.
This week marks the beginning of the playoffs (the brackets are here, if you’re interested) and I believe I should win this week’s game fairly handily. Next week could end up being the end of the road for Yours Truly, however, as I could very well face the bumskis a second time. Only time will tell.
Go Barrage!

Fantasy Football Results, Week 11

Losing is for Dummies!
The Barrage (196.50 pts) defeated Team V (140.50 pts)
The Barrage (196.50 pts) defeated TO’s Cry for Help (143.75 pts)

I pulled out another two wins in stellar fashion – while losing McNabb for the season to a torn ACL, Tomlinson and Chad Johnson both decided to go off and score me the vast majority of my points. That, plus my providential pick of the Cowboys on the one week that Peyton Manning decides to act like a human quarterback added up to victory for The Barrage.
Now, I’ve got to scramble for a quarterback to help finish out the season. I’m in trouble this week, as the bumskis have Drew Brees and all I have to offer is Steve “Formerly ‘Air'” McNair. Bah, says I.

Fantasy Football Results, Week 9

Chuck says
Self Destruction (150.50 pts) defeated The Barrage (147.25 pts)
Butt Stompers (169.25 pts) defeated The Barrage (147.25 pts)

Well, I went and did it – I allowed emotion and affinity for my hometown team to cloud my judgement, and oh, it cost me (as you can see). Had I simply kept my head down and maintained Roethlisberger as my starting QB, I would have one, but noooooo!, I just had to pick up Brad Johnson.
Well, McNabb is back in my lineup for this week’s games, so hopefully I’ll be able to recoup some wins and keep myself in good position the playoff race.