Guten Abend, meine Damen und Herren. Welcome to “Doug’s Brauhaus von Linkenarbeitsgemeinschaftigenluftenwarnungsteinen”. Tonight we are featuring a sumptuous feast of the finest in hand-picked links, personally selected by the owner. Please won’t you consider the menu?
First off, we have two exquisite examples of technological cluelessness, the first of which, “Shut Up I Hack You“, features self-inflicted “haxx0ring” spiced nicely with some inappropriate l33t language and mild cursing. Next, we have the finely-aged Attack of the Repo Men, resplendent with paranoia, legal threats and a near-obsession with Russian hackers. I would suggest a nice hearty red wine to go with either link.
For those of you whose tastes instead run towards a more refined videogames-centric list, we have a wonderful preview of the Wii-specific controller developed for Guitar Hero III, freshly-picked news of a forthcoming “Beirut”/”Beer Pong” game headed for the Wii, a piquant “Jane Goodall among the Geeks of Penny Arcade”-esque article from WIRED and, of course, the trailer for Penny Arcade’s upcoming computer adventure game, “On the Rain-Slick Precipice of Darkness”:Also of interest on today’s menu is a photo gallery of Goth Day At Disneyland 2007, a freshly-caught copyright infringer infringing on infringers who infringed upon him and word of the tarring and feathering of a known drug dealer in Northern Ireland.
Should you find the need to use our extensive, ahem, facilities, I might ask you to brush up on Male Restroom Etiquette:

For dessert, we have a lovely selection of Geeky Wedding Cakes. (I particularly like the Homestar Runner one, personally. Seriously.)
If I may be of any further assistance to you this evening, please don’t hesitate to call me back over to your table. Enjoy!