Bias, Thy Name Is “Passive Voice”

My wife noted this morning that there’s something wrong when CNN and Al Jazeera correspondents have been kicked out of Iraq and Newsday journalists have been thrown into prison, yet NPR remains in Baghdad. Today’s disgraceful report on the suicide/homicide car bombing in N-central Iraq very nearly pushed me over the edge.
NPR is truly disgusting. Their use of the passive voice in reporting this story made me almost have to pull my SUV, so blind was my fury.
They stated “A car blew up at a military checkpoint in north-central Iraq, killing 3 coalition special forces troops, a pregnant woman and the driver.” That evil car! How dare it take innocent human lives? When will we demand less-psychotic automobiles from Detroit? It’s a conspiracy between Big Business (controlled by the J E W S, no doubt), the Federal government (mandatory car counseling, now!) and the UAW, who coddle each Neon in its infancy, lulling it to sleep each night with stories of the evil American Capitalist/Imperialist Hegemony.
No mention of “suicide bombing.” Absolutely atrocious.
Small wonder that the remaining journalistic elements in Baghdad seem to consist of Peter Arnett, a German TV reporter and an NPR reporterette.

Monitor Coffee Spit-take

Today’s Bleat by James Lileks just about made me spit my coffee out, particularly this line: [H]ow do you know a Ba’athist is lying? His mustache is moving. And we curse it! Also laughable was

Across the street is a gigantic assembly building of some kind, perhaps the National House of Enthusiastic Rubber Stamping. It’s untouched. I’d wager a five-spot that they left it for whatever legislative body comes next. There’s no sign of bombing anywhere else, except for a small building down at the bottom of the picture; perhaps that was the Ministry of Minor Perfidy, or the State Bureau for Interrogative Dentistry.

The man has a genuine talent for placing words that, while highly unfunny in other contexts, are somehow hilarious when properly affixed to the (virtual) page.

Priceless

I don’t mean to rip this directly from The Corner, but it’s too good not to repost here in its entirety:

THE MINISTER OF INFORMATION [Jonah Goldberg]
I don’t want to risk any US soldiers lives for a photo-op, but wouldn’t it be awesome if we could get troops inside that briefing room during one of this joker’s tirades.
Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, Iraqi Minister of Information: We have the criminal Zionist oil gang on the run! The mercenaries are being destroyed. Victory is at hand for the glorious nation of Iraq and our supreme leader Saddam Hu—
Sgt. Williams, US Special Forces: Excuse me sir, you’re going to have to come with me.
al-Sahhaf: What? Get out of here! I am speaking to the media!
Williams: I’m afraid not sir. Say goodbye.
al-Sahhaf: Lying infidel! People of the world I ask you! Do you believe me or your lying eyes?”
Williams: Sir, seriously. Shut your pie hole or we’ll be forced to shut it for you.
al-Sahhaf: Okay….[whispering] could I get one of those ready-to-eat meals?

Kettle, This Is Pot, Do You Read Me?

I’m listening in on an al Jazeera interview (being rebroadcast on CNN) with Iraq’s information minister. He just referred to the Coalition forces currently knocking at his doorstep as “racists, Nazis and fascists”.
Wow. I’m laughing. Are you?

Less is Moore

I just caught an interview that Bill Maher conducted with Michael Moore. The sheer audacity of the man left me speechless.
He said (and I paraphrase): there were only a few initial boo-ers at his Oscar speech. According to Moore, it started in the wings of the stage and the upper tiers of the auditorium, then, the general Hollywood personas began booing the booers. He also stated that Bush’s 70% approval rating is due to the fact that the majority of people who pollsters call are working class or poor and thus more likely to have their children fighting in Iraq. Also, according to Moore, the 2002 elections were a referendum on the Democrats’ inability to form a coherent mission statement, not a de facto “good one” for the Right. And, best of all, the only reason he was so “emotional” on stage was that he wanted to get his lame Pope n’ Dixie Chicks line out and was afraid he wouldn’t be able to when the booing started.
I almost feel sorry for the guy. Being that disconnected from reality will, eventually, hurt him. I’m anxiously awaiting his documentary on the hunting habits of central African lions.

Singularity of Suck

Is it me, or does anyone else think that the upcoming Celine Dion concert being broadcast on CBS live from Caesar’s Palace in Sin City, hosted by Justin Timberlake could potentially be a scientific experiment designed to test the effects of gathering that much Suckage into a single room?
Perhaps it will be beneficial. A Singularity of Suck could well be established, which would, in essence, drain all remaining Suck out of the world, potentially making everyone’s lives better.
I’m hoping Carrot Top is the first entity down the hatch, followed shortly by Alec Baldwin and all the Shasta in the western half of the U.S.

Eartha Kitt: Hollywood anti-Idiotarian


As per my weekday routine, I had my radio tuned to the “Curtis and Kuby Show” this morning (Ron Kuby’s on vacation; Mark Simone is filling in more-than-adequately).
In the 9:30 timeframe, Eartha Kitt(!) decided to give the NYC morning show a call. After a bit of sweet-talking Curtis, she said that she fully supports “our boys, my country and my president.” She ripped in to the Hollywood loons for being unpatriotic and in general came off as a well-spoken, well-read person. Then, to prove it was really her, she gave a trademark Catwoman purr.
This from the woman who was so anti-Vietnam that she insulted Lady Bird Johnson at a White House luncheon, resulting in her blacklisting for many years.
There is hope in Hollywood!

The “Ficticious” of Oscar Night

As my wife and I flipped between the Oscars and BBC America last night, I was struck by just how inconsequential the entire Hollywood community has rendered itself and how desperately they want to disbelieve this fact.
In the two post-9/11 Oscar ceremonies, I’ve noticed that the Hollywood elite have been clamoring about just how relevant they are. They’ve repeatedly had to slap themselves on the back and remind each other just how much they mean to today’s society.
As a wise man once said, if you have to say something out loud in order to believe it’s true, it probably isn’t.
Nicole kidman, in her Oscar speech, asked a question to the effect of “Why are we here during such a time?” “Because art is important,” she answered herself.
Several presenters sought to remind us that movies teach us, inform us, lift our spirits, remind us of what it means to be human. I don’t know what Old School was supposed to teach me, but okay, I’m game.
I almost feel sorry for the lot. They’re trying ever so hard to maintain their connection with the American people. However, their raving-Leftie leanings have driven a bigger and bigger wedge between them and the Ameriproles out there.
We simply don’t want to hear people making between $2 million and $20 million, per picture, whine and complain about the inequality in today’s society. Their caterwauling rings false. Their claims of heroism seem absurd when viewed alongside the true heroism of the police and firefighters on 9/11, the soldiers welcomed with open arms by a up-to-now repressed Afghani people, or the mass of troops we currently have performing the “full titl boogie for freedom and justice.”
The Oscar telecast ended with Steve Martin telling our troops abroad that “We did this for you!” Bull, Steve. They’re doing this for us. They’re facing “stiff” Iraqi resistance. They’re moving about in full chemical gear, gas masks at the ready.
Until the Hollywood elite can realize that they’re nowhere near as important as they think they are, they will continue to lose the relevancy that they not only crave, but opportunistically screech about when presented with a ~1billion member audience.

“Fictition”?

This, from an Oscar “winner”?
Perhaps Michael Moore and Fred Durst have the same speechification coachenator.